If you have no idea what I'm talking about, read my last entry. And if you did, then you're probably laughing at my miserable ass, all melancholy and lethargic.
Visions of an energetically "cleansed" and toxin-free me, all shiny hair and tanned limbs pedaling down Santa Monica Blvd. quickly disintegrated as I realized that the only thing I'm going to be doing energetically for the next three days is SLEEP.
Tonight, as I walked into a work seminar on digital advertising, my eyes immediately darted to the 87 boxes of Domino's stacked neatly against the wall. I knew I couldn't have any, after having eaten only fruit and salad all day (a butt ton of fruit and salad, mind you). Watching my friends bite into the thick cheese and crispy crust, I felt arrestingly empty, like a friend had died. Probably a sign that it was time to try this out. Normally, if I was really starving, I'd house about 5 of those little slices. But not tonight!
The anxiety has passed, the fantasy gone, and the disillusion and general sense of gloom have set in. It's not that this is impossible--au contraire. I'm actually looking forward to tasting the juice. I am NOT, however, looking forward to lunchtime, which is pretty much the highlight of my workday, which tomorrow, and the next day, and the day after that will have become a sad void filled merely with a mixture of P.A.M. (Pineapple, Apple Juice and I forget).
In short, I have never wanted to bite into a stale, kind of cold slice of Domino's pizza so much in my life. This was probably not because I was really that hungry, but more because I'm used to getting what I want. And I don't say this in a spoiled way--I say it in an assertive, effective, ambitious way.
I don't mean to sound negative--I AM still doing it. I've come too far. And it hasn't even started yet.
.....but this is what I'm eating once I finish.
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